12 TV Commercials that are really about a parasite you didn’t know you had

During one of my recent trips to an out of town clinic, I had a spare hour to catch up on the news on a hotel TV. What fascinated me wasn’t the news, it was the TV commercials. Every commercial was about a health condition directly caused by a parasite.

To be clear, parasites weren’t the subject of the commercials. They weren’t even referred to. Instead, each commercial was about a product intended to manage a symptom. But I knew from experience that each of these symptoms was a side effect of having a parasite. Whether it be bad breath, dandruff, inflammation or the so-called common cold, people all across the world suffer from conditions that would be best treated by identifying and eliminating the parasite that causes them. But this wasn’t mentioned in a single ad.

Do the advertisers simply not know this? Did you know this? Here’s a subject list of the commercials I watched and below that, notes on the corresponding parasite that is most likely causing each condition:

TV commercials in a 1 hr period

tvs1. Psoriasis
2. Tooth loss
3. Tooth enamel loss
4. Bad breath
5. Knee and back pain
6. Hair loss
7. Dandruff
8. Bladder issues
9. Cold & sinus problems
10. Headaches
11. Eye glasses
12. Alzheimer’s

The Parasite that Causes Each Symptom

Here’s a short write up on each issue and an explanation of how the parasite is involved:

1. Psoriasis. This is usually a combination of parasites concluding numerous roundworms, tapeworms and flukes. There isn’t a specific parasite associated with psoriasis per se; instead the existence of psoriasis is an indication that someone has a parasite load way above average (average is 6 parasites, psoriasis is an indication of 10-15 parasites). The good news is this means psoriasis is curable, which is an upgrade from merely treatable as the commercial enthusiastically announced. Perhaps there is not the motivation to advertise this cure as eliminating 10-15 parasites is complicated, and there would be no money in it for the company selling psoriasis medicine. But probably they just don’t know. At least now you know.

false-teeth2. Tooth loss. From a smiling grandfather holding up a gleeful grandchild at a cottage at sunset to a happy retiree guy hitting a hole in one at some golf course in paradise, the enthusiasm with which denture companies portray the subject of a full set of artificial teeth is hard to match. So I’m not going to compete at that level but instead, shine the light of reason on the subject. Teeth, like skin and bones interestingly enough, are composed of the following base minerals: fluorine, silicon, strontium and calcium. Our enzymes convert those ingredients into tooth enamel, which lasts thousands of years longer than we last. So why do teeth fall out early? Yes, the teeth decay; sure, a diet rich in sugar can contribute; but no, these are not the root causes. What actually happens is a complex interaction between a parasite, usually in the roundworm family, and your teeth where the parasite waste results in a clogging effect that allows the teeth to become brittle or soft, and decay from the inside out. The sugar feeds the bacteria and that results in decay but the bacteria come from a parasite. If you’ve lost an adult tooth, you have a parasite. If you’re losing all your teeth, your have quite a high parasite load. This issue is treatable only at the level of getting out the parasite or getting out the tooth. It’s your choice but it’s also time-sensitive.

3. Tooth enamel loss. This is a variation on the theme of tooth loss but here you’re only at the soft or brittle stage. The expensive process of getting all your teeth ground down to the roots and gilded with a layer of artificial enamel is the vain attempt to gloss over the parasite-provoked tooth mineral deficiency. It’s like painting over rotten wood with fresh paint. Very rotten wood and very, very expensive paint that still won’t last because if the enamel goes the root is next. When the root finally goes, you’re into it with the denture people. It doesn’t have to be this way. Just get all your parasites out and you’ll have all your teeth until you’re 150. Or however long you want to stick around for.

Giardia, the leading cause of bad breath

4. Bad breath. Commercials featuring blue and green streams of swirling mouth wash splashing through thin air are a pressing reminder to rinse with mint flavoured chemical liquid after you brush every night. But do you need to? And if so, why do you need to? Bad breath of course. It plagues you from childhood, ends friendships and scares off strangers. It’s just morning breath, right? If you’re progressive you might have switched to natural mouthwash but the real problem isn’t natural versus artificial, it’s a parasite you don’t know you have. The most common parasite to cause bad breath is a water-borne parasite called Giardia (also known as beaver fever or montezuma’s revenge) which ironically enough you can get from the water you brush your teeth with. Giardia is mistakenly thought to be an intestinal parasite only. In fact it hitches a ride on the circulatory system within days of infection and buries itself away in the thyroid (gland in the throat) long after it is no longer detectable in the intestines via a stool test. If you get giardia, you’ve got it for life unless you take the correct dose of medications (doses can vary from 5 to 15 days based on where it has soaked into – usually 5 days is only good for intestinal Giardia). The proximity of your thyroid to your mouth accounts for the malevolent odour that wafts out while you speak (or kiss). If you’ve got bad breath, you’ve got giardia. But you may also have a roundworm or fluke in the esophagus, which can also contribute. Parasites tend to come in threes when it comes to a body region experiencing a noticeable symptom. If you get your parasite out, the bad breath will end that day. If it doesn’t, you missed an entire second species (e.g. Giardia may be gone but you will possibly also have the pork roundworm, for example, in the thyroid).

That about wraps it up for back pain

5. Knee and back pain. These body parts can experience pain very differently but were lumped into the same commercial because they were selling some compression-wrap clothing that claimed to reduce pain via compression. The concept is not original, they’ve been using it since ancient times but back then it was called mummy bandages. Cotton clothes aren’t so expensive that you’d lose your shirt to buy a shirt but compression, like a pain killer treats the symptom, not the problem. Unless there’s been a direct injury to the area, all back and knee pain is caused by a parasite, and often different organisms or multiple organisms within a single species. The common denominator in parasites that cause back or knee pain is that they need to be in the intestines or organ tissue but not the bloodstream (e.g. the pork roundworm in the kidneys can cause terrible mid-back pain, while a tapeworm in the small intestine will make your knees and elbows hurt like they’re being twisted off). Managing pain is much easier than finding your parasites, which is why it is common to believe that back and knee pain cause themselves but remember that wrapping yourself up like a mummy won’t solve the root cause.

The sheep on the left is convinced he has a parasite. Once a year he loses all his hair

6. Hair loss. While hair loss products can stem the tide of hair falling out, hair loss not directly related to chemotherapy is always caused by a parasite in your scalp. There are tissue roundworms that slowly crawl up to the scalp and live there. The longer they crawl around, eat your nutrients and excrete waste, the longer the roots of your hair grow nutrient-deficient. Stage one of this process is hair breakage, it’s very common to have hair that won’t grow past a certain length without snapping off. As the infestation progresses, whole hairs start to fall out.  By the time you notice it, the parasites are flourishing. We have different names for this condition: hair thinning, hair loss, alopecia, balding, male pattern baldness. And numerous root causes are proposed: high testosterone, low estrogen, genetics, aging. The good news is this condition is exclusively caused by a parasite. This might seem like creepy good news, but it’s good news because a parasite is treatable, while the other issues are not.

7. Dandruff. The social malaise of dandruff is blandly glossed over with a whole series of anti-dandruff shampoos from dry scalp support (hydrating) to full dandruff suppression. Dandruff is always the result of a parasite, usually the same scalp roundworm that eventually causes hair loss. The only way an anti-dandruff shampoo is going to treat dandruff is if it’s also antiparasitic shampoo. Now that would be a cool product. It’s taken decades to get to the point where we realize dandruff causes dandruff. I wonder how many more decades it will be before we’re seeing commercials that say dandruff is in fact caused by a parasite? My friends tell me “Leonard, not in your lifetime” but I have more faith in people than that.

This picture shouldn’t be in any senior’s house, unless it’s for their infant grandchildren.

8. Bladder issues. I once heard the human life cycle facetiously described as progressing from infancy to adulthood to infancy based on the pattern that people wear diapers as an infant, have bladder control as adults, and then return to diapers as seniors. It’s just normal right? But why is it normal? Kidney and bladder issues are nothing more than a kidney or bladder parasite. Because they’re tissue parasites, they’re usually treatable in 3 to 5 days. Imagine that. While there may be other parasites in the system that may, separately, take longer to treat, you can end a lifetime of issues with bladder control, for example, in less than a week. I think it’s a travesty of biomedicine that in our so-called medically advanced society, adults are being given diapers for their retirement when they should be given mebendazole, albendazole or praziquantel (roundworm and flatworm medicines) for an appropriate amount of time. But then why even wait till retirement? Something is very wrong with this picture.

9. Cold & sinus problems. The characters in cold and sinus commercials have to be method actors. They’re so convincing that I assume they prepare for their role by actually getting a cold and living through it. But how do you get a cold? Nobody knows, they just seem to go around. Then everyone gets one. Every time someone comes in for an assessment who incidentally happens to have a cold (they assure me it’s just a cold, my whole family has it), I keep hoping for the sake of novelty that they will finally have an actual cold but so far it has always been a parasite: usually hookworm, the dog roundworm (toxocara) or the pork roundworm (trichina/trichinella) that has clogged the lung tissue. It’s hard to know where you’d pick it up but it’s almost always from a food source. The classic cold symptoms are consistent with the body trying it’s best to expel parasites and their associated waste. Sometimes Giardia can also be a contributor, which coexists with roundworms. Out of 100+ so-called colds I’ve tested, so far I have always found a parasite in the lungs and sinuses. How many more times do I need to identify that a cold is actually a parasite before we can mutually agree that people don’t get colds, only parasites? To be clear, there is a bacterial infection that goes along with a so-called cold, and even sometimes, through rarely, a viral infection that coexists with the bacterial infection, but the originator of the bacteria is a parasite. The extension of this syndrome is asthma, which is caused by a more aggressive parasite presence in the lung tissue (either a higher count of one species or multiple, smaller counts of multiple species). So if colds (and asthma by extension) are easily curable by identifying and eliminating parasites (they are), then how does cold medicine work? It’s full of immunosuppressants that lull your immune system to sleep so that you stop attacking the parasite. Cold medicines are tailored to the parasite, not you. This isn’t a conspiracy, it’s just lack of education. But if we’re going to stay on that path let’s at least be honest about it: I propose we rename cold medicines as follows, so it’s clear they’re intended to allow the parasite to feast on your lungs and sinuses in peace: “Bon appetit: a parasite’s cold medicine of choice”. 

10. Headaches. I have heard the statistic that pain medication is a $15 billion per year industry in the USA alone. That was a while ago, the numbers could be much higher and the commercials are  definitely going strong. The actor’s head usually goes red, the background music is mournful. We feel their pain. Headaches are so ubiquitous that everyone has had one at least once in their life and many suffer horribly from them. What I am proposing is that suffering from a headache is suffering from a parasites in the brain. The most common are the protozoan parasites (giardia and entamoeba histolytica) which follow the circulatory and lymphatic pathways and can easily reach anywhere in your body. The immune system is weaker in the brain so they’re safe there. Other less common (but not uncommon) culprits are the roundworms (pork roundworm, dog roundworm, hookworm, strongyloides) and flukes (tissue flukes specifically). When these get found, and make their way into the news, which happens periodically, it is presented as a horrific one-time event because that’s what we’d rather think. In fact, it is common for parasites from all three categories to coexist in the brain. You’ll feel a sharp pain whenever they move or feed but the pain will go away eventually, and if you call it a headache and take a painkiller you can live with it. The most-repeated claim that tapeworm eggs get into the brain and can hatch, while possible, is extraordinarily rare. In 2000 assessments I’ve never seen it. So the real question is this: How do we reconcile our current, mistaken belief that headaches cause themselves with the fact that all headaches originate from brain parasites? It’s difficult. Most people just don’t want to believe it. It’s such a stressful thought that it’s easier to simply think a headache causes itself. Is there a way to bridge this monumental gap? It gives me a headache just thinking about it.

The earliest depiction of spectacles in an artwork is from a frescoe dated 1352 by Tommaso da Modena

11. Eye glasses. Eye glasses are thought to have been invented in late 1200’s. They eventually made their way into the fashion circles of Renaissance Europe and it became normal to wear them. Originally called spectacles, it was the Dutch spectacle maker Hans Lippershey who turned an optical lens into the first telescope and the Dutch scientist Anton van Leeuwenhoek who perfected the first microscope, inaugurating our understanding of the microscopic world. Partly because astronomy and microbiology are two of my favourite fields, and partly because spectacles remind me of the wonderful centuries that have now long since passed us by, antique eye glasses fill me with nostalgia. But why do we still wear them? With all our knowledge of the microscopic world, and with all our advances in diagnostic devices to analyze the eye, the human race is generally in ignorance (or denial) that a deterioration in eyesight is caused by a parasite. If your vision reduces to the point where you actually need someone to grind a lens for you (e.g. blurred vision, vision headaches, near or far sightedness), then you have a parasite in your eye or at the very least in the optical cortex of your brain (I don’t know which is worse to consider). It could be a microscopic parasite like giardia or entamoeba histolytica, or it could be a full-blown roundworm or fluke. I’ve seen them enough to acknowledge the pattern: to us, our eyes are indispensable; to a parasite, our eyes are food. This is a horrible thought, but not so horrible as doing nothing about it…not so horrible as going blind as you age. If you’re a practitioner reading this, or someone who knows how to conduct a scientific muscle testing analysis (keep in mind that thinking a thought and pulling your own finger isn’t scientific or for that matter muscle testing), there is a somewhat technical muscle testing diagnostic screen you can run to see if this applies to you or your patient:

Rough Instructions for a Parasite Screen of the Eyes

A. Someone else does a muscle testing baseline test on your indicator muscle, ideally the shoulder muscle.
B. You press gently into your eyelids (ideally while your eyes themselves are still open) and the tester redoes the muscle test, comparing the before and after strength.
C. If there is a weak response from testing the eyes, repeat step B and this time, place the following combinations of parasite medicines in your body’s BioElectric field to see if they turn the negative test from step B from a negative back to a positive. If they do, you’ve got a parasite. Which parasite is indicated by the medication and dosage of that medicine, there’s a science to it which this isn’t the place to go into as you’d have to understand pharmacology at a relatively high level.

#1 Metronidazole (up to 800mg)
#2 Albendazole (up to 800mg)
#3 Mebendazole (up to 6000 mg)
#4 Praziquantel (up to 30,000mg)
#5 Ivermectin (up to 60 mg)

Part of the challenge here is that even practitioners who use muscle testing aren’t using high enough dosages of the medicines to find the parasites they’re looking for. For example, you might test 250mg of Metronidazole (the Giardia dosage) and not get a hit on the eyes because you should have tested 750mg of Metronidazole (the Entamoeba Histolytica dosage). Each dosage indicates it’s own parasite and there are over 100 parasites you can find with this methodology. Then you need to be clear on the times/day and number of days that treatment needs to be implemented for, which can be unique for each of the 100+. There are thousands of possible combinations, making this an incredibly technical process and not for the novice. To be clear, I am not recommending these dosages be consumed, just used to find the parasites as a diagnostic screen. If prescription medications aren’t your thing you don’t have to take them (you could always try eliminating the parasite with a sound frequency), but if you don’t test at the dosages outlined above you won’t cover your bases and could miss screening up to 90% of the parasites your eyes could possibly have.

I would love to think that this information was benefiting millions of people who I will never meet, instead of them continually getting stronger prescriptions for their eyeglasses and slowly losing their eyesight. It’s not right. It doesn’t need to happen.

12. Alzheimer’s. These commercials are just depressing. If it’s not bad enough that you just watched a series of ads that tell you you’re going to get psoriasis, tooth loss or at least enamel loss, bad breath, knee pain, back pain, baldness, dandruff, incontinence, chronic colds, headaches and blindness, now you’re going to lose your memory and not even know all those other things happened. I mean, Wow. What an unfortunate, limited view of the human condition. 2 Million years of evolution, tens of trillions of neural connections in the brain, 7.5 billion minds sharing the latest scientific research on social media, we’ve split the atom, been to the moon, going to mars, some of our sages and mystics have attained pure enlightenment, we’ve produced Aristotle, Bach, Mozart, Beethoven, Shakespeare, Virgil, the Latin language, Isaac Newton, Einstein, binary mathematics, discovered the periodic table, analyzed the light from other galaxies and this is what we have to look forward to: mentally self-destructing? Somebody somewhere has missed something, and I think it’s a parasite… Alzheimer’s, like all the above conditions, is directly caused by a parasite. Because Alzheimer’s isn’t my primary focus, at the time of this writing I’ve only tested about 25 Alzheimer’s cases, but so far every one of them has been a combination of at least two parasites: an intestinal fluke that’s crawled into the esophagus and a protozoan (single-celled) parasite (giardia or entamoeba histolytica). In the cases I’ve had the opportunity to follow through with, I’ve noticed good restorative progress in cognitive functioning and memory when even one of the associated parasites are eliminated and there has been a near-complete turn-around when both (or all) were eliminated. Does that make Alzheimer’s curable? Is Alzheimer’s even a real condition in this case? I would propose that the symptoms are very real, even horrifying, but that the symptoms do not cause themselves. No symptom causes itself, that’s a logical contradiction – Aristotle would have been appalled. The aspect of Alzheimer’s that is being overlooked by mislabeling it an autoimmune condition is the parasite part of the equation. Get your parasites out and you can halt and possibly repair the damage that Alzheimer’s represents. Better still, get your parasites out and you won’t get it to begin with.

So That’s That

I turned off the TV. I had all these thoughts in my head and no one to tell them to. So I’m telling you. I hope this helps, you deserve to be healthy. Get your parasites out and it will happen.

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